It takes time to put words to what we're feeling; to name our emotions like a child names a sea of paper animals in a picture book. But even then, our emotions aren't always as they seem.

Emotions are like shape-shifters in this way. An emotion that might first look like "anger" could very well be "hurt", just like an emotion that might first look like "jealousy" could very well be "insecurity".

Because of this, it's important to sit with our emotions, giving them ample room to breathe and take shape. Once we're able to sit with our emotions and name what we're feeling––what we're really feeling––then we must find compassion for ourselves and what we're feeling.

We are so often ashamed by what we're feeling. We're ashamed to feel anger, hurt, jealousy, insecurity, lust, hatred, anxiety and stress. In a desperate attempt to escape this shame, we hide what we're feeling, we run from what we're feeling or we distract ourselves from what we're feeling.

Instead, we must treat our emotions like a mother would treat a child that has fallen and scraped her knee. We must hold space for what we're feeling and show ourselves a considerable amount of compassion as we process those feelings.

If we can learn to hold space for our own emotions, we can learn to hold space for other people's emotions too.

Compassion for ourselves can lead to compassion for others.