When you are hurt by someone close to you, your knee-jerk reaction is to hurt them in return. This isn’t because you are vindictive but because you are in pain. When you are in pain, you will do anything to make the pain subside.

While hurting someone that hurt you offers momentary relief from your suffering, the hurt will return and you will be left with not one hurt person but two. Instead, you must sit with you hurt.

You must treat your hurt like a fire and lunge your hand into the flame to get at the center of what’s burning. More times than not, the center of this hurt is love. You can only be hurt, truly hurt, by someone you love; and so in a fucked up way, hurt is evidence of the presence of love.

This doesn’t mean you should allow people you love to hurt you. But, it does beg the question as to whether or not you want to be the kind of person that hurts the people you love when they inevitably hurt you––or, forgive.